Most of the time, I don’t like silence. When I’m home by myself, I tend to automatically turn on the TV, just to have the background noise (particularly after dark). When I’m driving, I have to have the radio, or better yet, I have to find someone to call and chat with (with my hand’s free device, of course!). When I’m waiting somewhere for someone or something, I often have to find something to look at or fiddle with, so as not to have to just sit awkwardly waiting & staring.
Our society is becoming increasingly busy and increasingly “noisy” – whether it’s audible noise or just stuff to fill up our time. I think sometimes we are afraid of the silence. Afraid of feeling awkward or of being bored.
Last week was a pretty crazy week at work. All I wanted to do when I got home was to turn on the TV, lay on the couch, and veg out. Just to have mindless activity that didn’t require much out of me. We don’t normally watch a whole lot of TV around our house. We don’t even have standard cable – just the basic networks. But we manage to find something to watch when we want to.
So when this weekend rolled around, we actually felt like we had overdosed on TV for a while. Friday night, we ate dinner, watched one short show, and then turned off the TV and read. It was nice. It was peaceful. I felt rejuvenated and able to process some thoughts. The trend continued through the weekend. I actually got some really good thinking done, about several things. Imagine that.
Honestly, I think lately I have been slightly afraid of being too silent for fear of what God will whisper to my heart. We’ve been pondering lately what He is calling us to do – from the small daily things up to our grander life purposes. (That’s a lot to think about, I know.) And there has been a piece of me that is afraid of what He is going to require of me. What will He ask us to do or give up, and will I be able to handle it and do a good job – at whatever IT may be? One of my main prayer requests to my small group of friends recently has been for courage – courage to follow through on whatever may come up. So we’ll see.
Does this train of thought strike a chord with anyone else? Do you find yourself addicted to the noise?
And maybe related for you, or maybe not, do you find yourself somewhat afraid of what God is going to ask/require of you when you’re really listening?